black, black heart June 11, 2010

I miss everyone. I love everyone. I want everyone. How can you love everyone? You can’t. You shouldn’t. You’re spreading yourself way too thin. This intricate web of lies you’ve spun. It’s gotten so complex. You never meant for things to get this far. You believe in karma. All this will come back to you, [...]

Not Good To Know July 6, 2009

A million and one things have happened since the last post. However, this is not an update. I just need to let off some steam. I’m currently feeling incredibly let down and upset by my friends. Sigh. Sometimes, I guess I don’t know if I actually have any. There is only one person in the [...]

Weakling November 30, 2008

The Boyfriend came over this afternoon. We fell asleep together with him holding me in his arms. When I woke up and turned around to face him, I asked him if he loved me. For the longest time now I’ve been feeling less love for him than I had before. When he kisses me now, [...]

The Worst Goodbye November 28, 2008

I feel incredibly sad. The Classmate is currently in his plane, flying over the sea, back to his home. We didn’t even get to say goodbye properly because of everyone that was around. All we managed to do was glance at each other and go, “Well, bye..” and “Yeah, see you..” and he was off [...]

I Missed The Classmate Even When The Boyfriend Was Around September 10, 2008

I miss the Classmate more than I miss the Boyfriend. I feel like crying. What I said in this post turned out to be so untrue. That I didn’t like him? I still do. And I want to be able to be close to him. What is he to me??? What? I don’t know either. [...]

And The Worst Girlfriend In The World Award Goes To… August 23, 2008

… me. I cried for awhile as I was driving myself home alone at 3 in the morning. How is it that I have such luck that the people I fall for end up having had fallen for me as well. Why is my love always returned? I had already decided that I wanted to [...]

Hampa August 22, 2008

He likes someone else… . . . . I ought to be happy to have a reason to stop liking him, right..? Maybe the feeling will come later.

Counting Down the Days July 17, 2008

I want to cry. I want to shout. I want to run away. I hate where I am. I hate that I cannot walk by the beach. That I cannot hear the crashing waves as they come onto the shore. I cannot see the stars I so long for during the night. All I see [...]

Not understanding June 28, 2008

Why do you love someone who cannot love you the way you want them to? Is there any point? See him run everytime you need him most. I wonder how could I be so brave to love someone who does not love me to the same degree that I love him. Or is it how [...]

Bittersweet Weekend June 23, 2008

It’s been weeks since I’ve written here. I’ve just been so busy with assignments, field trips, and finals. But all those are finally over. I had a nice weekend where I did not get enough sleep. It really ought to be the other way around now that the holidays have begun! The part about sleeping, [...]